I got caught not knowing who I was...
I was mixing up what was real and what was fake...
Then I utterly confused myself.
I was trying to figure what I did or was naturaly or did fake
I had to ask some friends and their reply’s really humbled me…they said stuff about me that I never thought of. When you live like I have lived it’s a hard task trying to act one way and then in and instant behave differently. Soon (like me) you mix these two worlds. You wind up with chaos circling your head.
This post is more for me and putting my thoughts down but if you continue to read you will learn more about the real Natassia, which could be a bad thing because you will might think about things and realised I was fake with you or even lied to you and I am sorry if that occurs but you are welcome to read if you wish.
From here on I am writing this as if I am talking to myself i am the green writing
(An email I received from a dear friend)
She likes saying 'the joys of it all' Oh I do
She has brown curly hair which she has dyed a couple of times yes
She loves kids movies like Tarzan but she loves horror stuff Indeed, how messed up is that
She loves Batman I do I do I do
She likes cooking and is brilliant at it...specially those quiches brilliant not yet
She doesn't blush obviously Thanks goodness,
She is the most couragious person i know...which doesn't mean she's never afraid I never thought of it like that
She has a messy locker now I cant forget that
She wants to do more in life than simply survive I again never looked at it from that point of view
She has a passion for injustice I forgot all about that,
She is outstandingly original most of the time
She isn't afraid of speaking and will speak her opinions Sigh I haven’t spoken what I thought fir a while now.
She has a witty sense of humour try hard witty
She's a romantic that’s is my deepest darkest secret
She doesn't like cheese unless it's melted
She likes the smell of guy's deodorant I doooooooooo…it usually smells so GOOD!!!!
She has a flair for organising brilliant events correction in my head, they don’t always turn out right
She has a vivid imagination but it sucks when it comes out on paper
She is sometimes cynical about things yes guilty as charged
She is gifted at encouraging you know what I an
She gives her heart away easily yeah that’s a slight problem at times. I tends to get trodden on
She hasn't had the easiest life
She is also invariably stubborn
it means that once she has an idea in her head, she won't let it go until she has at least tried it.
It means that she becomes more stubbon in her stubboness the more people try to stop her from being stubborn
It means that she will fight for what she really believes in, for the things, the people that are truly important.
It means that she WILL find out what you aren't telling her
and you can't defy those eyes...ask Mrs Cadman Oh true to all of that, I am STUBBORN!!!!!! Yay…
She has brown curly hair which she has dyed a couple of times yes
She loves kids movies like Tarzan but she loves horror stuff Indeed, how messed up is that
She loves Batman I do I do I do
She likes cooking and is brilliant at it...specially those quiches brilliant not yet
She doesn't blush obviously Thanks goodness,
She is the most couragious person i know...which doesn't mean she's never afraid I never thought of it like that
She has a messy locker now I cant forget that
She wants to do more in life than simply survive I again never looked at it from that point of view
She has a passion for injustice I forgot all about that,
She is outstandingly original most of the time
She isn't afraid of speaking and will speak her opinions Sigh I haven’t spoken what I thought fir a while now.
She has a witty sense of humour try hard witty
She's a romantic that’s is my deepest darkest secret
She doesn't like cheese unless it's melted
She likes the smell of guy's deodorant I doooooooooo…it usually smells so GOOD!!!!
She has a flair for organising brilliant events correction in my head, they don’t always turn out right
She has a vivid imagination but it sucks when it comes out on paper
She is sometimes cynical about things yes guilty as charged
She is gifted at encouraging you know what I an
She gives her heart away easily yeah that’s a slight problem at times. I tends to get trodden on
She hasn't had the easiest life
She is also invariably stubborn
it means that once she has an idea in her head, she won't let it go until she has at least tried it.
It means that she becomes more stubbon in her stubboness the more people try to stop her from being stubborn
It means that she will fight for what she really believes in, for the things, the people that are truly important.
It means that she WILL find out what you aren't telling her
and you can't defy those eyes...ask Mrs Cadman Oh true to all of that, I am STUBBORN!!!!!! Yay…
And all my close friends know that I WILL find out what you’re not telling me ( David, steph you both know that well)
She is unbelievably thoughtful.
She thinks of things people completely miss.
She thinks more deeply than most people dare to sigh it costs a lot though.
She is the one that I know i can depend on
that if I was dying in hospital, she'd probably offer me her kidney Oh I would I would I would. That would be so cool…
If i have a bad day, she'll somehow make it all better by simply caring
She gives her all to people
but people rarely return the favour unfortunately so and then I get hurt…
She is unbelievably thoughtful.
She thinks of things people completely miss.
She thinks more deeply than most people dare to sigh it costs a lot though.
She is the one that I know i can depend on
that if I was dying in hospital, she'd probably offer me her kidney Oh I would I would I would. That would be so cool…
If i have a bad day, she'll somehow make it all better by simply caring
She gives her all to people
but people rarely return the favour unfortunately so and then I get hurt…
thats all so far
i feel more relaxed less choatic in my head
thanks friend
No comments:
Post a Comment