Never give up

I know we hear this all the time but I know that I tend to forget that God doesn't give up on us. It so funny that throught every thing bad I have done, some who knows it all still loves me. Isn't that amazing, although sometimes I find it hard to lean on him but when things go wrong what choice do I really have. I know my friends can't handle this pressure that I take but then why must I take it? I know we all can't live the same lives but why can't I live an easier life?

...

I wish people would treat me the way I treat them and it just hti me that people wont. Its to hard, I mean they way I treat people comes atr a cost but I suppose I dont mind

Me

It sso funny that at 16 a teddy still makes me feel better... I feel like a moment of all honesty, which frankly feels wierd when I'm typing it on  computer. Life sucks, when you feel bad and it sucks even mroe when your happy because you know its NOT GOING TO LAST!!!!!!!! No matter how much you want it to. What is even worse is that when your so bad and cut in side its hurts to much to tell some one, so I suppose in all despair I'm typing it up. I mean can you really convey to some one how much your hurting. If you really are that hurt I don't think you can and I can't. I want to fly soon...

FLY...

I'm not afraid to fall,it means I climbed up high

To fall is never to fail

To fail is to never of tried

I'm not afraid to fall

I just might fly

and

I will spread these wings fo mine

Thanks Mel

Rugby

I went to the Rebels rugby game verse the Warratahs. We lost 43 to 0, that is seriously HUMILIATING!!!
My favourite player wasn't there, bummer. But I was in the magazine for that game that night. LOL. Nothing major this week apart from a maths test oh wait and my first rugby training session!!!! I'm so excited, and way time to go and study

Just an average week

This week just gone by was a unsual weel. My closet friend said they needed space from me, and unfortunatley we don't talk talk or really talk any way. Some times we hang out but nothing like how I hang with the girls. So next thing you know they require space. I was like what the heck, sure. I respect them to give them space but due to the fact that it involves me I would like to know why and how I can give them this "space" and they just say they need space. I finally cleared it up and I still don't know what they are on about but thats life. Then I wrote a love note for a friend for another friend. Hahaha. Any way must do some tedious study.

India

Well I went to India, yay! It was not as good as I thought it would be, It was like after all of my travels so far, my heart has hardend to poverty. That changed! I learnt to STOP comparing my life, faith, looks and marks to everybody, because I do. ( even without knowing it, it almost sub conscious)Its so funny how at this age our life revolves around the opposet gender. Just observing guys and girls, me personally I have grown up out of it and I'm so glad that I have. Every body wants God's love as much as me even if they have stronger faith or not. I didn't realise how much encourage  people require, how much I need too. When we had special days and it was Happy Tash special day. People encouraged me and it brought me to tears, one verse someone gave to me was Matthew 25v34-40. Look it up ( if you can be bothered). if you read it, this person said that this verse reminded them of me. That made em feel so DAMN good! I always encourage others because I treat others as I wish to treated  but the reality is that they wont treat me the same way I treat them but they are too caught up in thier life. I met a little girl, 12 years old, called Mercy. She is beautiful inside and out. She, as every one knows, put most " chrsitians" to shame.  I was on a roll in India, i was connecting with everyone. I set the tone for the trip,  I felt like I could conqure any thing, I was full of life and God shone through me. You should know what happens next. The devil attacked, not small attacks or other stuff. My 2 BIGGEST weakness were not only it but hit so HARD!!! It put me down so much, until i snapped out of my selfish thoughst and was like no nick off. God this is for us and God knew just how to make me feel better. It was like THANKS God, thanks so much. Just a comment for me 3 followers always keep asking how some one is, so talk talk. It feels so good connecting and talking to God. I finally let God begin to shape me. I gave him a chisel, you probs like WHAT?? Not that any one noticed or asked but I haven't been doing so well and I guess people are sick ofme and my problems,but I will never be sick of my friends problems, never!I gave God a chisel to chisel the wall around my heart. When people meet me I place all my cards out, nothin fke or unreal. No masks, just me. It slike I love God because I want to too not because I have too. That the thoughts so far, might be more if i can think of any more.

I don't have a name for this blog, I mean do my 3 followers really follow? I wish they would comment on some stuff I write, why bother if no one reads it? Cause I'm as lonely as every one else who has a blog that no one reads. You write a blog in the end because it is thoughts usually that you have no one to share with, right? These thoughts should be shared with other humans but due to unknown factors we result to a "blog" I just finished reading a friends blog and he is pretty much agreeing to the above statement. So think about it, why did you create your blog?